By: Ranbir Puar, Free Within
It can be hard to be brave.
As a parent, I not only have to be brave more often than I ever imagined…but also in ways that I never imagined!
But in order to truly be brave, I had to have the courage to look within. Man, it wasn’t pretty!
In my childhood and teenage years, I struggled because I didn’t feel as though I fit in anywhere. I lived in a small town, and back then, yoga and all things Indian were not as fashionable as they are today! I felt embarrassed by my parents, by their clothing, their accents, and even by our food. I used to make up stories about my family life so I could be relatable to the kids at school. I wanted to be Canadian.
At home, I felt less than because I was a girl. My brother is only two years younger than me. I was too young to understand that the difference in how relatives treated us was a cultural thing…that it wasn’t BECAUSE of me. So I began to feel like I wasn’t enough from a very young age. You can only imagine how insecure I felt. Feeling as though I wasn’t wanted and that I didn’t fit anywhere made the voice of my inner critic LOUD and forceful.
I felt scared all the time…well, it sure felt like all the time.
To me, being brave meant just being ME. It meant letting go of the idea that I had to measure up to someone else’s stick. It meant letting go of expectations – of others, but more importantly, the ones I put on myself to please others.
Being brave also meant knowing that I was worth loving. That was a HUGE step for me – a leap of faith…and yes, the net did appear. But no one caught me in their net…it was my net. I made it. My inner champion rose to the occasion.
So, how did I go from being scared to being brave?
The first step I took in my bravery audit was monitoring my self-talk: What was I saying to myself when I was alone with my thoughts? I had to take ownership of the programming. Why? Because I had a choice. I had a choice to swim upstream to please others, or to finally let go and go with the current or perhaps even just float for a little while.
This exercise is NO different than training for a run, or working out. It hurts as you change, just as your muscles are sore after a hard workout. Sometimes it hurts for days…but it is a ‘good’ hurt because it is FEAR LEAVING YOUR BODY.
I used to think I was brave…but when I look back I realized I was just scared sh**less and made certain decisions because I was simply afraid of the alternative. It looks commendable that I was at least taking action. But, in many cases the action I took left me feeling empty and lost…so my ‘action’ didn’t always pay off for me. I was making decisions from a place of fear, not a place of faith. And if you too are making choices out of fear, that kind of action may not pay off for you either.
So how do you get to a place where you know that you are taking actions that are right for you? Actions that are based in faith? How do you let go of fear? How do you know which choice will lead you to an authentic, healthier life?
Where does that guidance COME from?
It comes from your inner champion. That part of you, that voice, wants to roar. It wants to silence your inner critic because it has had WAY too much stage time already! I have discovered a way to stay rooted in faith – not faith in something/someone else, but faith in ME.
I discovered that creating a gap between my thoughts allows the voice of my inner champion to rise up. This part of me is confident, clear, wise and it is determined. And sharing that discovery, and the tools and techniques for manifesting that kind of clarity is very important to me.
I’m inviting people to be in this conversation with me from the comfort of their home through a webinar that starts on November 2. I’d like to invite you to be part of Awakening Your Inner Champion.
Together we can uncover what being brave means to you.
Photo credit: Uncalno Tekno